FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

COLUMBIA, PRINCETON COLLEGIATE CYCLING EVENTS FALL PREY TO VICIOUS NOR'EASTER
Princeton Press Release Finds Disfavor Among Mother Nature, Old Man Winter

New York City/Trenton, NJ (March 17, 2007) - This weekend's Eastern Collegiate Cycling Conference (ECCC) events promoted by Columbia and Princeton were canceled due to wintry conditions that blanketed the northeastern United States. With up to one foot of snow and ice falling in Manhattan, the promoters were forced to cancel Columbia's Grant's Tomb Criterium for the first time in the event's thirty-year history. Not avoiding the storm to the south, Princeton Cycling regrettably was unable to hold their new and improved, inaugural time trial and criterium combo in Trenton, NJ that had promised to become an instant conference classic. "It is an absolute shame that we lost two of the ECCC's marquee events due to the storm. The promoters had been working for over a year on these races," said Mark Abramson, Conference Director of the ECCC. He continued, "Racing your bicycle on the streets of Manhattan is one of the best experiences in all of sport. Sadly, the class of 2007 is going to miss out."

Faced with events beyond their control, the race staff had lined up every contingency to guarantee that the show would go on if at all possible. Additional snow plows, salt trucks and even large-scale ice melting devices were brought in to deal with the snowfall and allow the races to continue. Further, both Ivy League institutions had called on their considerable cadre of alumni and benefactors to aide to change the impact of the wintry mix. Despite their best attempts, however, the promoters could only search for answers atop the snow banks and icy roads. "This is a real shame, we had prepared everything for this event, even baking scores of oatmeal raisin and chocolate chip cookies for intermediate sprint winners," said Columbia coach Rob Rowan. "We thought our biggest problem would be deciding who got the oatmeal and who got chocolate chip."

Searching deeper for rationale, some began to point fingers. "Princeton's press release, clearly that is what jinxed the conference," said Philly Phlyer promoter Joe Kopena. "Trash-talk has its rightful time and place, but three days prior to your own races when storms are forming in the Gulf of Mexico is decidedly not it." Others were also quick to highlight the correlation between throwing down the proverbial gauntlet via e-mail and the formation of race-canceling storm fronts. "This has been one of the mildest winters on record, with virtually no snowfall from December until now," said meteorological expert Ariel Herrmann, an alumnus of MIT Cycling. Pointing to a wall-sized 2x2 matrix plotting "weather" versus "keyboard-based posturing," the graph showed two distinct, outlying data points surrounding the weekend. "This graph displays a vast quantity of heated dialogue emanating from Mercer County of New Jersey on Wednesday. Coupled with the approaching low pressure system, this warm air mass spelled disaster for all of Collegiate Cycling."

Reached for comment, Nicholas Bennette, author of the aforementioned press release, quipped, "I didn't realize that those words I wrote in the safety behind my keyboard would cause such a change in the weather. I was just trying to make sure everyone knows that Princeton Cycling puts the 'Fist' in 'Sophisticated.'" As the sprint leader of the ECCC, some argue that he need only speak with his race results. Similarly, Bennette's teammate and overall points leader Nick Frey said, "I said we 'liked it a little cooler' because we are 'so hot' right now, but I simply went too far. Too far." The two could only shake their heads and stare wistfully into their hands as they shoveled snow in a futile attempt to gain more ECCC points. Before retiring for the day, Bennette said, "You know, this could be chalked up to conspiracy by some of my competitors. After all, I would have only extended my lead in the ECCC sprint competition and taken home all of those delicious cookies."

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