The ECCC's "Ask A Pro" Forum

Here is a forum where riders can ask questions of experienced pros - no question too basic or too advanced! Email your questions to amyw[at]alum.dartmouth.org.

Dear Amy,

To put it plainly, I have really hairy legs. I am considering going chic and smooth this racing season for the first time. My problem is thus: How much do I shave? Do I stop where my shorts start, and leave a sharp line which might look funny nude? Do I continue up? The hirsute generally aren't only blessed with hairy legs, but it may or may not continue far northward. Have you encountered others wrestling with this same problem?

Thanks,
Very Virile

PS - Half funny, half serious

Many top-level riders/stylists have heeded the call!

Nick Bennette, 2006 ECCC Champion responds:
You fall on your ass about 75% of the time, so if you're going to shave, shave your whole leg unless you like picking hairs out of scabs. If you just want to shave to look pretty and be able to wear a tennis skirt, then by all means, rock the mid-thigh wall of hair.

My take, at least.

P.S. NOTHING is quite as stomach turning as the "hair-line."

Nick Frey, 2007 ECCC Champion responds:

EVERYTHING MUST BE SHAVED, INCLUDING ***** ****. You will look ridiculous if this is not done with painstaking care and attention. You must also shave your arms, armpits, chest, *** (get a friend), and eyebrows to truly be a professional cyclist.

Cosmo Catalano, Dartmouth Alum and author of cyclocosm.com responds:

Simply put, hair shorts are not cool. Most riders I know shave the entirety of their legs, from the ankle to the to the top of the thigh. As a gentlemen of not insignificant coverage myself, I'll tell you the process of removing all that hair for the first time is going to be a grueling, multi-razor chore. But you'll thank yourself in the long run.

Though the aesthetic benefits are immediately apparent (your legs look jacked, chicks dig it), there are many practical upsides as well. If you ever get a post-race massage, you'll find things much more comfortable when your entire thigh is free of hair. Additionally, I tend to find that most road rash occurs in two spots - the outside of the shin, and outside of the thigh, up around the hip. Being smooth all the way up the outside of your leg will simplify wound care dramatically.

Of course, shaving this high on the outside brings up all sorts of questions about what to do with neighboring regions. I suppose it's really a personal decision what to do in those places, but just remember that whatever you shave has to be regularly maintained, at least through the end of the season. The potential consequences of shaving where you can't easily see, or of leaving stubble in high-friction areas, should make you think twice about doing anything too drastic.

Andrew Armstrong, 2005 ECCC Sexiest Male (1 vote) responds:

I get it. You are what one may call hairy, bushy, furry, shaggy, wooly, fuzzy, or simply “hirsute.” You may have nicknames such as downy, chewy, bear, beast, ware-wolf, woolly mammoth, Cro-Magnon man, or the missing link. During the summer, people probably tell you to take your sweater off or to remove your arm and leg warmers. People know you in the peloton not by your racing prowess, but because they always know when your arms are riding next to them: they’re the only ones that are a forest in need of a logging company. Well, testosterone-laden goat boy, you are not alone. I, too, have dealt with being a hairy guy in a smooth-man’s sport.

To shave or not to shave?

In case you are still debating whether or not to take “the smooth plunge,” I offer some of the following thoughts regarding the typical reasons listed for not shaving.

1. Too lazy to take the time. Why do you think girls love the winter? No, not because their jackets hide the off-season conditioning, but because they get to be lazy and not shave. Well, I’m right there with them.
2. Not that into cycling. Ok this might be true, but wrecks happen to everyone and it will be much worse if you have hairy legs.
3. Fear of being ridiculed. You’re not already being ridiculed for wearing spandex and riding in circles with a bunch of other dudes? Who the hell are your friends if they are not already making fun of you?!?!

I personally am not a fan of dudes that shave their body hair. Maybe it is because I am so hairy that I take offence to thinking that they must be repulsed by hair and thus are repulsed by me. Or perhaps it’s because those dudes always seemed to shave their bodies for silly reasons like “it shows my muscle definition better” and well those guys have always seemed like a bunch of vain idiots who are too full of themselves to stop being fake in some cheesy attempt to impress other dudes and “get the ladies.” Anyways, they are at least true in that hairless bodies do show muscle definition and veins popping out of the skin better, but at least you have a legitimate reason/excuse for shaving rather than the guys that do so because they think the song is about them.

When I was still a hairy wonder on a bike and taking flak from everyone for not shaving, even the CEO of USA Cycling once asked me when I was going to start shaving my legs. After being in a two-man break during the entire D race at the Beanpot crit he walked over while I was cooling down on the trainer and congratulated me on my race. Afterwards he said, “so when are you going to shave your legs” to which I responded, “as soon as I am racing something more than collegiate D and it actually matters.” Oh what little did I know?

Now that I have gotten used to the ways of shaving my legs I don’t think I’ll go back to my old ways of forested legs…even if and when I stop riding. Once you go smooth, you don’t go back. I encourage everyone to give it a try. Sure it costs a small fortune in razor blades and other accoutrements, but at least give it a try because if you’re hairy then one thing is for sure: just like those annoying weeds it’ll always grow back.

Technique / How to?

Now that you have decided to shave you are faced with the predicament of what exactly to shave and how. For the really hairy, I advise planning two hours for the ordeal and then using some form an electric shaver, trimmer, or weed whacker to thin the forest before beginning the actual clear-cutting, AKA shaving.

When I first “went smooth,” my initial decision was made out of both being uncomfortable with shaving completely and my laziness (largely due to my extreme hairiness.) It took me well over an hour to shave the first time and I decided to stop shortly after the bib shorts started. I had what my teammates and I liked to call the ‘boxer-short shave’ because I stopped shaving just after the start of my boxer shorts. I probably could have walked down the street naked and depending on their angle of view everyone would have thought I was wearing shorts. I believe it was at some point that summer when I decided to shave all the way up to my hips / waistline.

An alternative to the abrupt stop and resulting ‘boxer-short shave’ solution is to do what barbers do for the buzz cut and taper up. You know; shave your legs until just after where your bib shorts start and then begin using an electric shaver on a setting of 1, then a couple inches further switch to a two, and another couple inches later switch to a 3 until finally you are al natural as you approach your “more personal area.”

Needed Accoutrements:

When actually shaving be sure and use some form of shave gel. I know some people who just use their bar soap and create lather but I have found this to be an inferior method, but hey they’re your legs and who am I to comment. There is some debate as to what razors are better but the two I have found most people use are the Gillette Mach 3 (yes the men’s face razor) or the Gillette Venus women’s razor. I honestly go back and forth on which one I prefer and I know lots of soft and smooth legged women that use each, and trust me they can both result in very nice legs. I also suggest using some form of lotion when you are done. I prefer the Aveno Active Naturals Positively Smooth moisturizing lotion which helps sooth the skin and ease razor burn after shaving. It also supposedly helps you shave less often but since I have a 5-o’clock shadow by lunch, I think I’m too hairy to tell if that’s a crock or not.

What to shave:

I suggest shaving the entire legs and hips where you can feel your hip joint at the top of the femur especially when your leg is bent. This is because:

1. When you wreck you do not just scrape your lower legs. In fact most of my road rash has come on my upper legs around the hip area where the impact is actually made with the pavement and I start sliding and scraping along.
2. Freshly shaven and smooth legs in clean sheets is quite possibly one of the simple, almost sinful, pleasures of life known only to women and elite male bicycle racers.
3. Four freshly shaven and smooth legs between those sheets is also quite an experience, from what I’ve heard.

I also suggest shaving slightly above your waist-line on the front/sides. This is in case you wreck and your handlebars twist violently, slamming against your side. You will have a bruise and likely a cut there. It is right where your boxers and pants naturally rest so you will then try to bandage it up with Tegaderm or some such thing and hair gets in the way of all that.

While I have not tried it, I do not think I recommend shaving the arse, if it is hairy enough to warrant shaving or for you to even consider shaving then it is probably enough hair to cause stubble and I just don’t think stubbly butt is what you want when trying to go through the day and sit down etc.

As far as what else to shave besides your legs below the waistline, I can’t give you much more advice as it is more of a personal issue. I do know however that before every major sports game the grounds are trimmed and the lawn is mowed and we all know that no one likes riding along in the gutter because, you never know what crap you’re going to get into.

What will the ladies or other guys think?

I cannot comment too much on what the ladies may think. I am not one nor do I purport to understand them. It should not however matter if it “looks funny,” because frankly your tan lines will always look funny but here are some other reasons to consider as to why it should not matter:

1. No one should be seeing you nude, at least not anyone that you care what they think or that you are trying to impress. Instead of getting personal by getting nude with people you should be getting personal with your bike. I know mine is the only ride for me.
2. If he or she does not ride a bike then you do not want to be with them and if they do then they should understand and y’all should be training instead of whatever it is you’re doing.
3. If they do care then they really didn’t like you that much anyways but since you are already at the naked stage it probably won’t matter too much. You will likely just miss out on the second date.
4. If the other person likes you and is worth you liking him or her then don’t worry about it looking funny when nude, he or she won’t care.

Go ahead. Embrace who you are. Make the commitment to the peloton and the way of the bike by shaving your legs. Now if only I could figure out whether or not to shave my arms like all the other pros.

Andrew Armstrong is a former Boston College cyclist and is a cat 2 track and road racer. Currently he coaches a high school cycling team and manages the Texas High School Cycling League. He is also a pretty hairy dude who once got a vote for the 2005 ECCC’s sexiest male rider. The voter wrote: “Andrew Armstrong. So Hairy.”